The Thoughts Inside My Head

Monday, the start of my week, and it started quite shockingly. I woke up at 7:30, kinda early for me. Last night, I’ve watched this National Geographic Channel Special called "Gospel of Judas", it’s about Judas’s side of the story, the betrayal and the famed "Judas’s Kiss", and to tell you honestly, the special will somewhat shock you. (For further 411, head to the national Geographic Channel Website or watch out for the show on the channel).

Anyway, my cousins was here for the weekend and I was very happy, cause being the only child, I treat them like my own siblings (all 8 of them). This morning I went again to Lucena to pick some files and more medicines for lil’ miss veggie. First I picked up the files, buy some magazines, got the address of a certain bank and I’m off to my fave place (SM). Take a piss first, then went to BookSale, find some place to eat lunch and the restaurants are filled cause it’s lunch-time.

Penshoppe, off I go. I tried to find some clothes, bags and some underwear. When I was done finding (and really just window shopping), I went out of the store. Then out of nowhere the door alarm (those metal-detector-thingy’s-spotter-spotting-shoplifter-species) went off. I was kinda dumbstruck when this buttish-pimply-faced-saleperson called and alledgedly accused me of shoplifting. I was on the verge of a major BREAKDOWN. But I kept my composure and somewhat tell the truth that I didn’t took anything. (If my raging bitchy temper and tactlessness emerges, this salesperson will experience a major-BITCH FIT, F words will fly, opening a can of Whoop-Ass, butt-kicking and even an immediate suspension will be served). This moronic-male specimen accusing me for shoplifting really shocked me, and I left the freakin’ store. The next time I’ll go to Penshoppe, I’ll make sure I’m going to buy everything in the store and had him fired. Bench is next, I really want to buy this tees that I like, but my moolah baggage is on strike so I ended up leaving the store emptied paws.

In my every visit to SM, I always stop at National Bookstore to check out if a new book of house plans is available for me to splurge on. Every since I was like in elementary or high school I’m always reading house plans (my dream is to become an architect, but freakin MATH always bite me on my behind, so the dream to be an actual one is gone). I’d rather buy read them than a regular novel, which I find somewhat boring. So I found a new one, 325 New Home Plans for 2004, and head to the cashier to buy it. While paying the book I was purchasing was not recognized by the cashier-sensor-thingy and I waited for at least 10 minutes to pay for it, and the good thing is, I never had gone to have another of my BITCH FITS, and I politely waited (a not so typical me, I’m always impatient human). The weird thing is, I’m always in a hunt for another book of House plan, when I have 3 books at home (one has 154, 325 and the big one 650), I’m never satisfied, I want to buy every book out there.

I’m really anorexicly hungry and must find some place to eat but all of them are full. I ended up in the food court and ordered Pork Teriyaki, which is not that well cooked and it slightly burn my tongue. Again I bought Cookies and Cream from the renowned shake maker ZAGU (love, love, love ‘em). To go back home I had to ride the jeep at the terminal (which I not usually do), and I ended up consuming my melting ZAGU at home.

Give lil’ miss-veggie her daily shower and went to the other house to cool myself off on an inflated orange pool. I attempted to dip naked (a really awful sight) but I didn’t.

Being accused of shoplifting, waited for some unrecognized price tag and skinny dipping, one of my more interesting days so far.

Auf Wiedersehen…

It was 9:30 am when woke up, and that’s way too late for my Lola’s waking up standard. So I went straight to the bathroom to take a piss, go downstairs, eat breakfast, drink my coffee (with cinnamon, yumm-o). Then go upstairs, watch the replay of Project Runway, heat water for my mom’s showering encounter, buy 7 diapers for her. When I was buying the dye-pees, the people on the store was so moronicly-kind of specimen. Every time I go there, I had to say “7 Adult XL’s please” over and over again. If these happen again, I’ll curl and straight their hair over and over again till their hair looks like a kinky pubic hair. (Those moronic specimens) I went to Lucena to buy some medicine for my vegetable-ish mom and some ingredients for the cake that I’ll bake for tomorrow. In the van (going to Pacific Mall) I was seated at the back, then I suddenly smelled an icky smell of human armpit, it’s not me, I just taken a shower, maybe it the 3 bitch-bunch in front of me or those awfully-not-so-fab-kids sitting near me, I don’t know.

I’m at the mall, I head over to the grocery to pick up things for my cake, buy medicine for little-miss-veggie. I also asked how much Lamisil is (for my morbid case of athletes foot). Then I went to Delgic (my fave pirated goodies store) and to my surprise, it’s closed for some renovation. I’m so sad, that I can’t buy another illegally-made-piece-of-entertainment-for-my-own-use. I head over to this other pirated store, and to my shocked self, I witnessed parking space meltdown of the moment from this nearly-matronic-smoking-lady. She’s demanding for the parking space, which I may point that said space was intended for the customers of the pawnshop near the pirated store. She’s a hit to the by standers, walking on the sidewalks and people inside the store. I was so happy for her, that she can cause a major meltdown over a parking space in public, I wish I can do that to, I haven’t had a bitch fit for a long time. Nearly forgotten to buy the most important ingredient of a cake, the flour. Gotten on a jeep for SM. At the entrance, Miss Teen Philippines is happening now. It made me happy, I finally got to unleash my tactless mouth, commenting on those girls, being wannabe models, not-so-good English skills, boring-to-death-talent-presentations, things that I like to do when watching a collection of female species trying to win a crown.

But before that, I went to the groceries again to buy some more stuff for me. The pageant was in third floor so I dragged my fat behind there. I waited and waited for it to start, I wanted to scream and shout “start the fuckin’ pageant already, I don’t have all day”. So it started (finally), they dance to Pussycat Dolls song “Beep”, they sashayed down the not-so-long runway. It was somewhat boring, some of them cant do a runway walk, (they need Miss J. Alexander, runway trainor- extraordinaire from ANTM). The host are also awful, they are speaking in English, when the whole audience is Filipino, how clueless can you get, and when they interview the poor 4^th Runner Up from last years pageant, I just wanna leave right now and I left. I have to eat cause I didn’t had lunch and Im freakin starving (anorexicly starving). To my benefit, KFC is there to rescue me from my hunger and order the Chicken Steak Combo with large drinks and mash potato. Great, Im full now, being a glutton-ish-fat-ass myself, I had to have Cookies and Cream from Zagu (my fave flavor) and went again upstairs to see more female specimens wow us with their quick wit and charm. It was disappointing when this first girl didn’t answer her question correctly, felt sorry for that clueless-in-english contestant, to make it more disappointing the girls are wearing these what-the-fuck-are-you-thinking-when-you-wore-that-dress-you-look-like-an-alien-with-your-veins-out-there-exposed dress. So that’s it I don’t want to see another monstrosity-stupidity-kind-of-pageant, I left the mall. Inside the van (going home), I was so uncomfortable cause there’s not enough leg room, and my legs need room. Finally, when I was going out of the van (I’m two blocks away from home), this I-can’t-see-your-face-bitch slam the door when I’m still inside. Made me so mad, I’ll pluck all of that bitch’s body and put it all in her face.

What A day, no so exciting than yesterday. I’m here writing this entry for you read. Till next time…..

Auf Wiedersehen….         

Ok. So my day is half nice and half crappy. I woke up 6:30 am. I had breakfast, gotta love my grandfathers hardinera (the best), coffee and an episode of Seinfeld (one of my fave shows). Then I had to clean our car, my Lola needs the its coz it’s her 77^th birthday and she’s gonna treat 3 of her friends in Palaisdaan (a fab restaurant, it’s like known all over) and I’m not going with them coz today is also my baking class graduation. The graduation is at Pacific Mall, 1:00 pm

After washing the car, taken a shower, watch The Stepford Wives (a movie which I somewhat love), eat lunch while watching American Idol (my fave show at the moment), and leave the house at 12:10 to go to the mall for my graduation. The van didn’t leave until 12:45 (I said to myself I’m gonna be so fuckin late) and when I got there not so much people are there and Im a little relieved. It started like at 2:00 (Filipino Time, it sucks) Then this matronic figure that is the director of the LMSTC (Training Center) blabs about this training center (Ive been a graduate of dressmaking course last January and she had the same speech) please, the next time I’ll be graduating (I’ve taken up Driving), hoping you’ll change your fuckin’ly overrated collection of words that is your speech, if you don’t I’ll slap you like a new born baby butt (joking)…. Intermission numbers are in the graduation and some of them sucked bad. Full of booty shaking is not enough for an intermission. I expected that I’ll get an award but I didn’t, Tita Baby is Best in Breadmaking and this quiet girl from another class (Janette) is the Best In Cake. Well, so much for hoping, maybe next time Ill enroll again and be on the top of the class. Tita Baby then treated us in her friends restaurant and the barbeque is tasty and the weird thing is the VINEGAR is to die for….

After eating, just want to see again what’s in the mall, then I decided, I have a little money, what am I suppose to buy? I just wanna go home. Im in the van and this loud-voiced-so-not-fabulously-skinned-yet-nicely-curled-hair girl was so loud inside the van,  I just wanna scream at the bitch and threw her ass off the van and say “Shut up you fuckin’ whore, I don’t need a noisy bitch around me”. Then this Weirdly-faced-mongoloid-ish-freak girl is just staring at me and somewhat laughing at me made me so mad, that I wanna pay for her plastic surgery so bad that she can be a little bit attractive to my eyes. And to top it all off, the driver was askin us passengers if anyone is gonna take off at the stop and no one answered. Then, being a lazy freak that is me, (not wanting to cross the street), tried to shout “PARA PO” on the other side of the street, didn’t stop, so I had to shout again. He stopped, I was so pissed the I unintentionally and allegedly slam the door very loudly, and I think I heard “Pare next time dahandahan ang pagsasara”, so that’s it, if I can catch the van I’d say to the driver is, “I don’t need an Overweight-then-slightly-skinny-now-slug-that-is-you to tell me what to do, so back off you pig”.

That’s a really fun, rough, somewhat bitchingly day for me. It’s a good thing today is the season finale of Project Runway (my fave show too) is on. Finally something to relax me, a show about designers, models, catfights, backstabbing was a nice way to unwind.

I was shocked that Mandisa (this plus-sized-fab-singer from American Idol) was eliminated. Was I too harsh, too tactless, live with it.

Bye……      

What’s on my mind right now.

1. I wanna eat again, drink coffee,
2. Exercise
3. Listen to music
4. Go swimming
5. Go shopping
6. Go shopping for pirated cds and pc games (luv ‘em, their so cheap and so illegal)
7. Make another house for The Sims
8. Download some skins for my sims (as if i need some, i have like maybe 2,000 skins)
9. Hate more people
10. Hate my mom, for like ever (coz she’s a terminally ill- bitch)
11. How to get a job
12. Can’t have a job cause of my MOM.

It’s like so many, it’s as if I can do ‘em all at the same time, I can’t even multi-task.

What should i do.

Im a skinny person living in fat body. Ive never been skinny my whole life. I tried exercising, dieting, even starving myself and becoming a bulimic. And everyday im gaining weight, my clothes don’t fit me. I cant even buy new clothes because those freakin’ store dont have sizes for fat bitches that is me.

Ive been exercising and dieting during Sept-Oct 2005 and I think it paid off. I lose a little weight and some of my somewhat skinny-clothes fits me. But all of a sudden, my urge in having a lean and defined body came into a screeching halt when my mom was rushed to the hospital and for 3 days, I stop exercising becAUSE ME AND MY AUNT have to sleep in the hospital to watch little-miss-missy. After that my focus is gone.

Ive tried it again (exercising, dieting, being a bulimic) for a week, and no, i stopped. I just love to eat. I Love food. How can I starve myself when there’s always food around.

I think I need motivation and self discipline, this is the key to my dream. If this never happen, i should eat myself till i can’t eat no more.

Here I am, once again.

OK, so my daily ritual is this. Wake up, like 7:30 or later. Eat breakfast, cook or buy my breakfast. To something with my computer, watch some ETC shows, eat lunch, watch some more tv. Then heat up some water, for my mom’s bath. (BTW my mom is like so sick, I wish she’s dead, I’ll tell you bout the whole MOM story in a couple of days) Give mom a bath, take a bath myself, listen to some music, watch some more tv, eat dinner, wait for my fave tv shows (Project Runway, Lost, One Tree Hill, American Idol, Veronica Mars, Tyra, Tonight Show or Conan, whatevers on). And stay up till 1 or 2 in the morning.

And this ritual will happen again for the next how many days.

This is how my life is like, boring till death. No social life, no friends near by, so what’s the lil’ ol’ me to do??? Nothing, stick with the ritual and die by boring natural causes.

Bye………………..

Hi y’all. Finally, I have my own blog. BTW, I really dont know much about blogs. When I first heard the word, like what’s a BLOG. The word sounds like someone or something fell down from the sky… Then I read the GQ 2003 Overrated list, and I see BLOG. I mean it’s already over rated and I dont even know what BLOG is. So it got to me, I need to know what a blog is. So I asked Karla (my cousin for like ever, we share the same birthday) what a blog is. She said it’s like a journal, where you right your thoughts, memoirs, and such and you’ll be sharing it to the world. My reaction was over the top…. "You mean people are gonna see/know what are my thoughts (good, bad, ugly, nasty, erotic, satanistic). I was so shocked that I want to have a blog myself

So here I am, A BLOG virgin (and a virgin for all sorts of things), ready to share whatever is in my own twisted mind. Be ready, because I will unleash my claws to everything that I like, love, and lust about.

Bitchiness, vulgarity, tactlessnees (I hope is allowed here) is what I will be offering.

Till next time, and remember, Everyone is a freakin’ bitch (at some point of their life)

Babbage for now….